It’s been 6 months since I’ve actually posted, truly blogging stole my heart a long time ago and then kind of broke it. I suppose every person has dreams of becoming a blogger and expecting the success to happen over night. Truly I think I believed that it would just happen for me and everyone would flock to hear what I have to say.
In reality the ‘build it and they will come’ is not at all true. Especially in our digital age where there’s so much more involved. It kind of made me sad for a long time as I thought myself a failure to not write and share consistently, what all my fellow bloggers were doing. You know what I’m rewriting that story right now, as I’m proud. I’m actually proud that my dyslexia didn’t get the better of me and I did manage several blog posts and built an awesome site. I learned so many lessons, trials and tribulations and now I’m kind of over the bullshit of being a ‘blogger’ I just want to share and let my voice be heard. No following what I think I should be writing about as I honestly don’t think I can completely colour within the lines anymore.
I’ve struggled because I toyed and deliberated so much with the idea of who I want to be and appear rather than who I truly am and that doesn’t sit in one category. How can anyone sit in one category? Solely dedicated to one topic of conversation or solely within one are when you’re creative? It’s truly baffling that I thought that fitting into that pink, sugar coated mood of just talking about makeup would truly serve me as it doesn’t. As I felt like I was denying some part of myself that screamed but I’m a graphic designer, an artist, a business woman, a creative, an entrepreneur, a psychic, a spiritualist, a woman, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a girlfriend. How could anyone possibly be just 1 and focus on 1 thing when it just isn’t so? I’m all of these things rolled up into one and I’m sure many more that I am yet to share.
As I am yet to embark on a new turning point of my life, I want it to be documented. Somewhere I can turn back to and look to see how far I’ve come. For where I once was, heck it may even help you in your turning point. Truth is I’ve been an in-house full time graphic designer for over 3 years now. At the beginning of my career and I wasn’t sure I liked where I was heading. Down a road I never wanted to take but felt I had to conform to societies rules of working a 9-5 job and climbing the ladder. Taking a job in a city that had been my home for many years but away from those that are most dear (Hey that kind of rhymed hehe). Living a life that did not fulfil me, but that’s just life right? Not everyone loves their jobs or what their doing right? We just have to get on with it… right? Wrong. I couldn’t do it anymore but I couldn’t decide what I wanted to do next, a lot of ideas and options but no real clue. What makes me excited? What idea fills me with SO much joy that I couldn’t possibly say no to it?
California… California CALIFORNIA CALI FORN IA
Yes that was it California! The place I scribbled on my notebook at 14 years old, doodled on and drew a camper-van. Picturing myself being carefree in the sun, driving around the sunny beaches and cities. Listening to pop rock and indie music whilst humming The OC theme tune by phantom planet. Now THAT is what I want do and where I want to go. Contained with SO much glee, I ran the idea by my boyfriend. Of course me being me, it was outlandish. 3 months I said and we’re going to go and quit our jobs, pack up and hit the road. At first he wasn’t as thrilled with the idea, of course because I had t thought it through.. in any way shape or form. I was ready to pack our bags and we’re out of here!
We compromised and added Canada to our list and started figuring out the details. Worked out our savings and when we would actually be able to travel. Turns out 3 months was a no go. With all the weddings happening throughout the year, already preplanned adult arrangements and not a lot of savings. We had to figure out how long was feasible and how much will we need and be able to save. Safe to say we whittled it right down to 5 weeks and cut Canada out of the equation (I promised we’d go on our next one, even though I’m already thinking about Bali)
Now 5 weeks didn’t feel like it would be worth leaving our jobs, but nope we’re doing this. Pure & utter freedom, no responsibilities just us and the open road. Something I may have forgotten to mention is that me and the boyfriend have been together 4 years and throughout have been ‘long distance’ really it’s mid distance when it’s on average a 3hr drive. It’s time to take it up a notch and at least be in the same place as each other for a consistent amount of time. So really we’re putting our relationship to the test, a trial run. Sharing a car with anyone for 5 weeks solid would be a challenge especially as I love my personal space & alone time. So this will be interesting but also a trip of a lifetime, scary but also exhilarating. Ah I’m trying to make it sound more dramatic, I’m not really worried. Because I’ve dreamed of this trip for so long and dreamed of being with each other for so long, it makes perfect sense to do both together. Although I still have to pack and have a list as long as my arm but instead decided to write a blog post at 1am. ?
Things are about to get realll interesting. I can’t promise I’ll post about it or even make a video or any form of real commitment to sharing but what I will say is that I will no doubt have shameless Instagram photos in all the hot spots of our trip.
So follow me here and I’ll keep you updated.
And that’s me, that’s where I’m at right now. 5 days left until my last day at work and then 9 days till we board our flight heading to our first stop…L.A baby!
No clue what I’m doing after we come back or next, a rough guideline of our route and part of our Airbnb’s booked on route (hey if you use that link with this code, it’ll give us both a discount. I mean I did just tell you that I’ll be jobless when I get back. Do me a solid, I’d appreciate it ?). Just a girl with no clue, an idea, a dream & a hella lot of anxiety ?
I’ll see you out there, here (maybe) or on the gram ✌?